Ricky V the V.I.P. (Very Insubstantial Poster)

Ok, so I know how most people out there are a bit on the fence over ‘technology’. “Is it really going to catch on?” “What’s in it for me?”

These views were equally common as they were appropriate. Until today.

To finally place suitable worth in technology, simply follow the below steps.

For those of you unaware of my current nomadicy, the time has come and passed for me to leave Spain and it is onwards to Ljubljana (that’s in Slovenia). The time for cultural assessments will come later, probably, but for now, let me share a tale from one of my computing classes.

As a Geographer in a previous life, my concerns are often focussed on the spatial (all you historians with your ‘temporal’ can do one). This interest has continued into ‘the man’s’ current attempts to turn me into an engineermachine and, as such, I am enjoying following a course in ‘Spatial Planning and Floods’ (or the delightful acronym SPAF). In this course, we have computing classes where we have been assigned a region of Slovenia (don’t all jump at once) to create a spatial plan for. All very good.

Within this work we have been handed regions randomly and I was lucky/unlucky/impartially-lucky [delete as appropriate] to receive the region of Črnomelj in the south of Slovenia, bordering Croatia. And, so, there I was plodding through my work when what do I see? Like the angels of immaturity shining down on me in the middle of a humdrum activity, there it was. The village of my dreams:

Fučkovci

Yep, thats Fučkovci. Fučk-ov-ci. Fučk-off-see.

To be honest, I think that my time in Slovenia is already complete. But if you want anymore information about the existence of this place, well, it is a city based of the common Slovenia surname of Fučko.

Fučko. Fučk-o. A person name Fučk-o. Frederick Fučk-o.

Accordingly, the village is actually Fučko’s village. A village of Fučko’, like a terrible town Ash would visit in Pokemon. The sort that wouldn’t have a Pokemon Gym. Would just have really annoying people telling you about how they ‘collect acorns as they are cool’, when acorns have no real relevancy to your quest to become the best. Bloody Fučkos.

Man, Slovenia is a funny country.*

And if any of you punks reading this think that I have got lazy and that this is just a weak excuse to ‘kinda write a rude word without actually writing it’, well you are massively accurate. But you can all take a one way hike to Fučkovci: population YOU.

* Please note, this is exclusively my only experience with Slovenia being a funny country. Unless you classify calling ‘Aldi’ ‘Hofer’, in which case, ‘hah-de-Fučkovci-hah’. *

In the hostel in which I am staying, there are also a few hotel rooms that are meant to be swankier. Well I imagine they are meant to be swankier than the 8-man dorms without sheets or towels that are full of people drinking beer in silence (I was in one for 1 night and had to move to a four-man dorm full of people drinking beer, but conversing). To return to topic, I came across an advert in the ho(s)tel for one of the ‘swankier’ hotel rooms and it is one of the most brilliant things I have ever seen.

It is so brilliant that I feel it could be steeped in irony - but, with not a single hint of irony elsewhere in the building, I can only agree upon one thing: this advert is simply amazing.

Better go and do some corporate agreement and business deal!